After all the doom and gloom in the newsroom yesterday, today I am working with a group of media students at the local University.
And to quote the old cliche: what a difference a day makes.
They are all fresh faced and excited about getting jobs in the industry, enthusiastic about news and broadcasting.
What a wizened, cynical, embittered old hack I seem in comparison!! It's astonishing to think I was the same as them only 8/9 years ago, when I first got into journalism.
What a difference a decade makes...
I hadn't the heart to tell the students about how bad yesterday was, and about what I believe is the imploding state of TV news. And they will be cheap to hire - so may get jobs very easily anyway.
After all, the company that I work for ran an advert a few weeks ago, appealing to "new talent" to come forward and apply for jobs, "no experience necessary." (!!!)
You can imagined how angry and heartbroken we all were - what's wrong with us, the old talent?!
Don't worry - I already know that the answer is in the question. We are too expensive....
Saturday, 4 October 2008
15 - This Too Will Pass
Today is one of the dark days.
We were given the specific number of job losses across the country, and it's bleak.
In my newsroom, for every ONE person that will keep their job, TEN others will lose theirs.
There were audible gasps as the verdict was read out, despite a year of build up.
In the end, it was worse than we could have feared - isn't it always with redundancies?
And those who do stay won't even recognise their new job, because it will be so different to the way they worked before.
But through all of the tears and fears today, all I can do is relentlessly keep reminding myself of the wise advice of my family: "this too will pass.**"
** Borrowed from Abraham Lincoln, of course... and he probably got it from someone else!
We were given the specific number of job losses across the country, and it's bleak.
In my newsroom, for every ONE person that will keep their job, TEN others will lose theirs.
There were audible gasps as the verdict was read out, despite a year of build up.
In the end, it was worse than we could have feared - isn't it always with redundancies?
And those who do stay won't even recognise their new job, because it will be so different to the way they worked before.
But through all of the tears and fears today, all I can do is relentlessly keep reminding myself of the wise advice of my family: "this too will pass.**"
** Borrowed from Abraham Lincoln, of course... and he probably got it from someone else!
14 - So Far From Whence We Came
So Ofcom have announced their findings.... and yesterday my Blog was an outpouring of my general anger at the situation.
But it is personal too, as you know.
And now my bosses have decided that they still need a bit more time (argh!) to digest the findings, and tell us what it means for our jobs. Though considering Ofcom have approved the entire plan, there can't be that much head scratching.
Still, it will now be early next week before we are given some real ideas about how many job cuts there will be. And even then, it's all open to another round of discussions and consultations....
So it could be ANOTHER month or more before we know definitively exactly how it will work, and whether I have a place in the New World Order. 14 months after the first announcement about job losses. After that there will be the interviews, selections and dismissals or offers.
Do you get the sense that this is like slow, steady, mental torture for me? I continue to work my hardest in the job I love...
But I can't sleep, I can't talk about anything else, I can't plan my life beyond the next few months, yet I can't stop planning all of the variable outcomes. I'm driving loved ones mad.
I suppose it's my mind trying to impose order on chaos. But if it carries on like this for much longer, I'm sure I'll lose my grip....
And underneath all the worry, anger, speculation and desperation is the same relentless throb of sadness.
How has it come to this?
13 - Ofcom: a Toothless Tiger?
So the verdict is in.
And despite an entire year of rigorous analysis, debate and procrastinating, Ofcom have decided that ITV go ahead with its plan to slash regional news exactly as it is. The finer detail is still to be determined, but not one of ITV's core ideas has been altered, improved or even rejected out of hand.
ITV can do exactly what it planned. And many are very happy with that.
And so regional news patches with be merged from 17 into 9 - and "local" news patches will triple in size. They will now cover geographical areas that range from Land's End to northern Gloucestershire, from Dover to Banbury in Oxfordshire, from Banbury to northern Nottinghamshire and so on.
You get the picture. Vast.
And the Watchdog, which is supposed to protect viewer's interests, is allowing regional news to be decimated.
In the next few days, the details of how that will affect my working life will become clear.
But for now the general employees are just all dismayed and devastated. That between the Unions and Ofcom, not one extra regional service or one extra job has been saved.
But what can we do?
In the end, as with everything, it all comes down to money.
And the buck stopped today, with Ofcom.
And despite an entire year of rigorous analysis, debate and procrastinating, Ofcom have decided that ITV go ahead with its plan to slash regional news exactly as it is. The finer detail is still to be determined, but not one of ITV's core ideas has been altered, improved or even rejected out of hand.
ITV can do exactly what it planned. And many are very happy with that.
And so regional news patches with be merged from 17 into 9 - and "local" news patches will triple in size. They will now cover geographical areas that range from Land's End to northern Gloucestershire, from Dover to Banbury in Oxfordshire, from Banbury to northern Nottinghamshire and so on.
You get the picture. Vast.
And the Watchdog, which is supposed to protect viewer's interests, is allowing regional news to be decimated.
In the next few days, the details of how that will affect my working life will become clear.
But for now the general employees are just all dismayed and devastated. That between the Unions and Ofcom, not one extra regional service or one extra job has been saved.
But what can we do?
In the end, as with everything, it all comes down to money.
And the buck stopped today, with Ofcom.
12 - The End is Nigh
Tomorrow Ofcom publish its review of Regional News, and how it will look in the future.
For most people, that will involve finding out how their BBC license fee will be better spent, and how their ITV local news will change.
For me, it's a verdict on whether there will be a job for me, and my friends, in the new world order. And where my base will be, how my working life might change.... etc etc.
It's a day that has been coming for more than a year now.
But it turns out that it is possible to long for, and to dread the same event.
Many feel that news from our bosses is long overdue. But it's unlikely to be good news, as it has been made clear from the start that budgets - and staff - will be cut. Drastically cut.
The tension at work for the last few weeks has been unbearable. Lots of short tempers, sick days, whinges about workload, tearful phone calls to colleagues on the drive home. And everything in between.
Tomorrow will crank up that pressure even further.
Wish me luck.
For most people, that will involve finding out how their BBC license fee will be better spent, and how their ITV local news will change.
For me, it's a verdict on whether there will be a job for me, and my friends, in the new world order. And where my base will be, how my working life might change.... etc etc.
It's a day that has been coming for more than a year now.
But it turns out that it is possible to long for, and to dread the same event.
Many feel that news from our bosses is long overdue. But it's unlikely to be good news, as it has been made clear from the start that budgets - and staff - will be cut. Drastically cut.
The tension at work for the last few weeks has been unbearable. Lots of short tempers, sick days, whinges about workload, tearful phone calls to colleagues on the drive home. And everything in between.
Tomorrow will crank up that pressure even further.
Wish me luck.
11 - Deadlines
How well do you perform under deadlines?
I ask because my working day is made up of three, or often four immovable deadlines. If I miss those deadlines (the on air slot for my story) by even a few seconds - I may as well miss by days.
And that would mean big trouble. No greater sin for a reporter than to "not make" my slot, as the jargon goes.
And friends often comment, "how do you cope with the stress!?"
But actually, I am better under immediate pressure, and so is the entire team. We all make decisions more quickly, think more clearly, and communicate more efficiently. And I find that the day flies by when I am working towards mid morning, lunchtime, early evening, and even late programmes.
Don't get me wrong, it's not always ideal. When you are lost driving to a live location, don't know the subject properly and only have twenty minutes until you are on air (which has happened more times that I can count!) I would give anything to slow time.
But the rest of the time I thrive on it.
Perversely though, over the years it has made me hopeless at every day tasks when out of work. If something doesn't need doing in the next few hours, I don't bother!!
I've become a last minute merchant, which isn't a popular trait...
I ask because my working day is made up of three, or often four immovable deadlines. If I miss those deadlines (the on air slot for my story) by even a few seconds - I may as well miss by days.
And that would mean big trouble. No greater sin for a reporter than to "not make" my slot, as the jargon goes.
And friends often comment, "how do you cope with the stress!?"
But actually, I am better under immediate pressure, and so is the entire team. We all make decisions more quickly, think more clearly, and communicate more efficiently. And I find that the day flies by when I am working towards mid morning, lunchtime, early evening, and even late programmes.
Don't get me wrong, it's not always ideal. When you are lost driving to a live location, don't know the subject properly and only have twenty minutes until you are on air (which has happened more times that I can count!) I would give anything to slow time.
But the rest of the time I thrive on it.
Perversely though, over the years it has made me hopeless at every day tasks when out of work. If something doesn't need doing in the next few hours, I don't bother!!
I've become a last minute merchant, which isn't a popular trait...
Wednesday, 10 September 2008
10 - Blame the Law or the Media?
Further thoughts.
In the case of reporting a victim or accused/guilty's name, I don't make the rules.
I don't like hiding behind the law, but if it states that I can't name those people, I can't name them.
Part of the reason I don't name then is because I could get fined or go to prison for contempt of court...
But strictly selfish reason aside, I believe it is a morally grey area too. In the most extreme cases, I could be the root cause of a vigilante attack etc because I published a name.
In every case that I cover I have a different moral opinion about the right or wrong of publishing a name. And so does the public.
But my opinion doesn't matter then, and it never matters in any story I do.
(Why should anyone care to hear what I think, and anyway, Ofcom requires me to be neutral.)
And in these stories, the law is the law. Dont name names.
If that pisses you off, blame the law not the media.
In the case of reporting a victim or accused/guilty's name, I don't make the rules.
I don't like hiding behind the law, but if it states that I can't name those people, I can't name them.
Part of the reason I don't name then is because I could get fined or go to prison for contempt of court...
But strictly selfish reason aside, I believe it is a morally grey area too. In the most extreme cases, I could be the root cause of a vigilante attack etc because I published a name.
In every case that I cover I have a different moral opinion about the right or wrong of publishing a name. And so does the public.
But my opinion doesn't matter then, and it never matters in any story I do.
(Why should anyone care to hear what I think, and anyway, Ofcom requires me to be neutral.)
And in these stories, the law is the law. Dont name names.
If that pisses you off, blame the law not the media.
9 - Reporting Restrictions
I've been involved in a debate about protecting the identity of victims of crime and their accused. And why reporters do it.
The simple answer is because the law demands it. A child under the age of 18, or the victim of rape, for example, are instantly made anonymous. It is a rare case when a reporter gets those court reporting restrictions overturned. If reporting the name of the accused/or their relatives would also identify the victim too (known as "Jigsaw Identification") then the convicted also gets the luxury of their name never being known.
It may seem frustrating to the public who have a "right to know."
And it is frustrating for me too. Because believe me, there isn't a journalist out there who won't want to publish those names. Often you can sit in court and even feel emotionally part of some kind of cover up, simply because you know the name of the guilty, but aren't reporting it.
But each time that happens I tell myself that the law is made up by far more sensible people than me. And their aim is to protect the vulnerable, even at the expense of not exposing the guilty. And they are dispassionate about those laws, where as I am caught up in the heat of something outrageous which is inflaming my opinion, rightly or wrongly.
I feel like I want to expose it all to the court of public opinion.
I believe that justice should not just be done, but seen to be done.
But in legal cases, I quell any instinct to publish and be damned if the law, and only the law, deems it harmful to others who are innocent.
The simple answer is because the law demands it. A child under the age of 18, or the victim of rape, for example, are instantly made anonymous. It is a rare case when a reporter gets those court reporting restrictions overturned. If reporting the name of the accused/or their relatives would also identify the victim too (known as "Jigsaw Identification") then the convicted also gets the luxury of their name never being known.
It may seem frustrating to the public who have a "right to know."
And it is frustrating for me too. Because believe me, there isn't a journalist out there who won't want to publish those names. Often you can sit in court and even feel emotionally part of some kind of cover up, simply because you know the name of the guilty, but aren't reporting it.
But each time that happens I tell myself that the law is made up by far more sensible people than me. And their aim is to protect the vulnerable, even at the expense of not exposing the guilty. And they are dispassionate about those laws, where as I am caught up in the heat of something outrageous which is inflaming my opinion, rightly or wrongly.
I feel like I want to expose it all to the court of public opinion.
I believe that justice should not just be done, but seen to be done.
But in legal cases, I quell any instinct to publish and be damned if the law, and only the law, deems it harmful to others who are innocent.
Tuesday, 9 September 2008
8 - Those Who Can, Do
Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach. Those who can't do or teach get jobs as reporters. Or so the saying goes.
Well, in addition to working full time as a TV news reporter for two different television companies, in the (very little) spare time I have left over I also teach at a local University.
It's on one of the "Media" degree courses, which are actually much maligned within the industry. I think Editors like a person to be a blank page to write on.
My job is to teach the Undergraduate and Postgraduate students how to write broadcast news.
I don't really think I am a natural teacher. I am more of a doer. And trying to break down how I do a thing that comes relatively naturally to me has been a fascinating experience. Helping them to learn has also taught me long forgotten tricks. And they certainly ask a lot of questions and make you think!
It's hugely enjoyable, and it's also made me less complacent.
Lots of my family and loved ones come from a scientific ilk, and by comparison, I just "write and talk a bit for a living." They do incredibly intellectual things, that have the parameters of right and wrong answers to help define their skills and intellect.
But teaching has reminded me that I do have a huge range of skills to offer. They just aren't as obvious as the ones that a doctor or an engineer has.
The ability to put people at ease very quickly. To make small talk, and draw the best out of people. To talk with authority on a wide range of topics, off the cuff. And so on.
Oh and to be the source of celebrity gossip at dinner parties for my friends. Apparently that's what they are most impressed by anyway...
Well, in addition to working full time as a TV news reporter for two different television companies, in the (very little) spare time I have left over I also teach at a local University.
It's on one of the "Media" degree courses, which are actually much maligned within the industry. I think Editors like a person to be a blank page to write on.
My job is to teach the Undergraduate and Postgraduate students how to write broadcast news.
I don't really think I am a natural teacher. I am more of a doer. And trying to break down how I do a thing that comes relatively naturally to me has been a fascinating experience. Helping them to learn has also taught me long forgotten tricks. And they certainly ask a lot of questions and make you think!
It's hugely enjoyable, and it's also made me less complacent.
Lots of my family and loved ones come from a scientific ilk, and by comparison, I just "write and talk a bit for a living." They do incredibly intellectual things, that have the parameters of right and wrong answers to help define their skills and intellect.
But teaching has reminded me that I do have a huge range of skills to offer. They just aren't as obvious as the ones that a doctor or an engineer has.
The ability to put people at ease very quickly. To make small talk, and draw the best out of people. To talk with authority on a wide range of topics, off the cuff. And so on.
Oh and to be the source of celebrity gossip at dinner parties for my friends. Apparently that's what they are most impressed by anyway...
7 - Making My Own Luck
What is it they say about buses, all coming along at once?
Well after a wasteland of wondering how I was going to continue to be a TV reporter after this staff job ends, today I had four freelancing leads land in my lap in one morning.
Each one is only for a few days work here and there. But I believe Robert Frost when he said that way always leads on to way**. So I will keep faith that each concrete job booked in, will lead to another.
So two days ago, I felt scared.
Today I feel excited.
It's a good job that I never feel sick on rollercoasters...
**The beautiful "The Road Not Taken."
Well after a wasteland of wondering how I was going to continue to be a TV reporter after this staff job ends, today I had four freelancing leads land in my lap in one morning.
Each one is only for a few days work here and there. But I believe Robert Frost when he said that way always leads on to way**. So I will keep faith that each concrete job booked in, will lead to another.
So two days ago, I felt scared.
Today I feel excited.
It's a good job that I never feel sick on rollercoasters...
**The beautiful "The Road Not Taken."
Thursday, 4 September 2008
6 - Turn and Face the Change
The idea of losing my job is both horrifying and elating.
It's time to explain why it's happening.
My company is making cutbacks, so my current job will be completely revolutionised. The stories I report, my hours, my geographical patch, the technology, will all change.
Then there are the friends who will lose their job, in order for other friends to keep theirs. In all, 55% per cent of us will be cut.
Naturally, opinion is divided about whether this change is a good or bad thing. A new beginning, or the death of a golden era. There's no right answer, just the fact that it IS happening.
All I can say is how it makes ME feel. And the over riding emotion is this: immensely sad. Because I love my job, and I don't want it to change.
In the next few weeks, the selection process will begin for those who want the new style jobs. The rest will apply for voluntary redundancy, and then work on until the changes are implemented next year.
I am about to officially declare, for the first time, that I have decided to leave.
I know it is the right decision for me.
But I still feel very scared.
It's time to explain why it's happening.
My company is making cutbacks, so my current job will be completely revolutionised. The stories I report, my hours, my geographical patch, the technology, will all change.
Then there are the friends who will lose their job, in order for other friends to keep theirs. In all, 55% per cent of us will be cut.
Naturally, opinion is divided about whether this change is a good or bad thing. A new beginning, or the death of a golden era. There's no right answer, just the fact that it IS happening.
All I can say is how it makes ME feel. And the over riding emotion is this: immensely sad. Because I love my job, and I don't want it to change.
In the next few weeks, the selection process will begin for those who want the new style jobs. The rest will apply for voluntary redundancy, and then work on until the changes are implemented next year.
I am about to officially declare, for the first time, that I have decided to leave.
I know it is the right decision for me.
But I still feel very scared.
5 - The News Agenda
Of course every story that I do is being done for a reason.
The news schedule of the day is set by my bosses, who are reacting to events. I am sent out to report accordingly. And every story that I do has an "angle."
But I believe that is no where near as sinister as it sounds. I suppose I would say that! Let me explain.
Today, for example, N.I.C.E finally allowed people with the eye disease Macular Degeneration to get the drugs they need for free on the NHS.
I don't go with an agenda to bash NICE, the law requires me to be as neutral as I humanly can. But my "angle" is to get the human side of that Government announcement. I speak to someone with the disease, and ask their genuine opinion.
Yesterday I spoke about wanting interviewees to be angry.
But actually, my only "agenda" when I do that is to try to reflect the truth of somebody's sentiment off camera as accurately as possible.
So, I might go to interview someone who has lost the only respite care they get for their disable child, and that they desperately need. Or someone whose home was flooded. Or who spent 75 hours on a hospital trolley, or whose home was broken into. The list goes on.
They are all angry in reality, but the nerves and artificiality of a camera pointing at them makes them seize up. So my job is to say to them, "pretend that I am that person from the council/hospital/thieves. I am going to play Devil's Advocate and ask antagonistic questions to make you faithfully articulate you real feelings the best that you can."
Hand on heart, I have never made up someone's opinion about something, or made someone give an angry quote when they don't feel that way.
In fact, I don't know a reporter who has. And that gives me enormous optimism. It gives me faith in the integrity of my industry.
Now, I have seen some scurrilous behaviour. And in every single case, it was done by a reporter from a national tabloid newspaper. Never a broadcast journalist. Draw your own conclusions from that.
That said, I also believe that it is crucial that people question what I report, why I am saying it, and who my sources are.
I am rigorous about questioning every press release, every interviewee, every line of my script. About questioning my morals and what I am doing.
I fully expect the same rigorousness from my audience.
And I never expect them to agree with my conclusions.
The news schedule of the day is set by my bosses, who are reacting to events. I am sent out to report accordingly. And every story that I do has an "angle."
But I believe that is no where near as sinister as it sounds. I suppose I would say that! Let me explain.
Today, for example, N.I.C.E finally allowed people with the eye disease Macular Degeneration to get the drugs they need for free on the NHS.
I don't go with an agenda to bash NICE, the law requires me to be as neutral as I humanly can. But my "angle" is to get the human side of that Government announcement. I speak to someone with the disease, and ask their genuine opinion.
Yesterday I spoke about wanting interviewees to be angry.
But actually, my only "agenda" when I do that is to try to reflect the truth of somebody's sentiment off camera as accurately as possible.
So, I might go to interview someone who has lost the only respite care they get for their disable child, and that they desperately need. Or someone whose home was flooded. Or who spent 75 hours on a hospital trolley, or whose home was broken into. The list goes on.
They are all angry in reality, but the nerves and artificiality of a camera pointing at them makes them seize up. So my job is to say to them, "pretend that I am that person from the council/hospital/thieves. I am going to play Devil's Advocate and ask antagonistic questions to make you faithfully articulate you real feelings the best that you can."
Hand on heart, I have never made up someone's opinion about something, or made someone give an angry quote when they don't feel that way.
In fact, I don't know a reporter who has. And that gives me enormous optimism. It gives me faith in the integrity of my industry.
Now, I have seen some scurrilous behaviour. And in every single case, it was done by a reporter from a national tabloid newspaper. Never a broadcast journalist. Draw your own conclusions from that.
That said, I also believe that it is crucial that people question what I report, why I am saying it, and who my sources are.
I am rigorous about questioning every press release, every interviewee, every line of my script. About questioning my morals and what I am doing.
I fully expect the same rigorousness from my audience.
And I never expect them to agree with my conclusions.
Tuesday, 26 August 2008
4 - *Star Quality*
I have two friends who have separately interviewed Bill Clinton, since he left office. Both said that before hand, they hadn't really though twice about his actual appeal , his *star quality.*
Both were just interested to interview a world leader. Both came away mesmerized by him. One even joked that she felt hypnotised in his presence! They were bowled over, and that is quite something for hardened hacks.
He was so incredibly charismatic. And that doesn't completely translate on TV, apparently. Both ladies also said he was highly attractive, as well as... well, powerful, I suppose.
One of them had also interview Princess Diana, and said it was exactly the same with her - that both people lock eyes on you and make you feel incredibly interesting and significant, the centre of the room.
What a gift to have in life, to be able to make people feel that way...
Again - interestingly - I am told that one Barrack Obama possesses the same gift in person.
So do you need a proper connection with and interviewee in order to get a good interview? Of course, it helps.
But often you meet the person very briefly. Or they are in grief, or traumatised, or very nervous. So you are taught ways to relax people before an interview, or techniques to get them to open up on camera.
I think it helps to just naturally be a warm person, and engaged and interested in them. Empathy gets you a long way in life, I have found...
Though sometimes you want them angry ... so I just deliberatly ask antagonistic questions and wait for the fireworks. No connection needed.
Both were just interested to interview a world leader. Both came away mesmerized by him. One even joked that she felt hypnotised in his presence! They were bowled over, and that is quite something for hardened hacks.
He was so incredibly charismatic. And that doesn't completely translate on TV, apparently. Both ladies also said he was highly attractive, as well as... well, powerful, I suppose.
One of them had also interview Princess Diana, and said it was exactly the same with her - that both people lock eyes on you and make you feel incredibly interesting and significant, the centre of the room.
What a gift to have in life, to be able to make people feel that way...
Again - interestingly - I am told that one Barrack Obama possesses the same gift in person.
So do you need a proper connection with and interviewee in order to get a good interview? Of course, it helps.
But often you meet the person very briefly. Or they are in grief, or traumatised, or very nervous. So you are taught ways to relax people before an interview, or techniques to get them to open up on camera.
I think it helps to just naturally be a warm person, and engaged and interested in them. Empathy gets you a long way in life, I have found...
Though sometimes you want them angry ... so I just deliberatly ask antagonistic questions and wait for the fireworks. No connection needed.
Sunday, 24 August 2008
3 - Seven days a Week
This week, I am working every day. I report for two different companies, who produce very different types of news.
The variety is great; the hours are not. But as the prospect of having no steady "staff job" income looms closer, I find it hard to turn down any extra shifts.
It's just that the more tired I get, the more certain I am that I'm giving neither job my best. And that is tough, because I want to enjoy every moment while I can.
Now, I have friends and family who work 70 hour weeks as Doctors or Police Officers, and who are in the Military serving abroad in Afghanistan and Iraq. I know that by comparison, I have it easy.
Very easy.
All I do is talk for a living, and hope it makes sense! (borderline decision...)
And hey - we have TV's on our desk at work - so it's definitely the job for me.
I can watch the Olympic Closing Ceremony and kid myself that I am actually at home.
The variety is great; the hours are not. But as the prospect of having no steady "staff job" income looms closer, I find it hard to turn down any extra shifts.
It's just that the more tired I get, the more certain I am that I'm giving neither job my best. And that is tough, because I want to enjoy every moment while I can.
Now, I have friends and family who work 70 hour weeks as Doctors or Police Officers, and who are in the Military serving abroad in Afghanistan and Iraq. I know that by comparison, I have it easy.
Very easy.
All I do is talk for a living, and hope it makes sense! (borderline decision...)
And hey - we have TV's on our desk at work - so it's definitely the job for me.
I can watch the Olympic Closing Ceremony and kid myself that I am actually at home.
Saturday, 23 August 2008
2 - Future Leaders
The other day I was sent out to interview Conservative Leader David Cameron for about the 10th time.
I'd like to say he hasn't changed from his early days as a young, fresh faced MP. But being groomed for power obviously makes politicians think about that dreaded thing... "their image."
Understandable, sure. But ironically it seems to make them less and less palatable, the more they worry about it.
It's not that I don't like him.
I may even vote for him and his party, who knows. I have already tried voting for both of the other parties, so why not get a hat trick?
It's just that Cameron always seems very... what's the word I'm searching for...?
Smooth.
Very rehearsed.
Even so, watching him meet the public, and do interviews with me on a whole variety of topics on a variety of occasions, I am positive I am looking at the next Prime Minister.
And he does the whole charm thing a lot better that Gordon Brown, who I have also met and interviewed. He seemed VERY ill at ease, with small talk, with interiews, with it all - hell, even with smiling.
But Cameron doesn't seem to have the same effortless ease that Tony Blair did. Again, I have met and interviewed the former Prime Minister.
I will not use the word "charisma" here, obviously.
Still, watching all three of them up close is a fascinating affair - especially how they act in the off beat moments. When they think no-one is watching, or they are talking to close advisors. When their public smiles and facade slip ever so slightly.
Cameron's hidden body language always seems to say to me, "Did they like me? Did I do that OK? Did I get all the questions right and am I top of the class? Am I the most popular?"
And I always find it hard to really like someone, who makes it so clear that they really want to be liked.
I'd like to say he hasn't changed from his early days as a young, fresh faced MP. But being groomed for power obviously makes politicians think about that dreaded thing... "their image."
Understandable, sure. But ironically it seems to make them less and less palatable, the more they worry about it.
It's not that I don't like him.
I may even vote for him and his party, who knows. I have already tried voting for both of the other parties, so why not get a hat trick?
It's just that Cameron always seems very... what's the word I'm searching for...?
Smooth.
Very rehearsed.
Even so, watching him meet the public, and do interviews with me on a whole variety of topics on a variety of occasions, I am positive I am looking at the next Prime Minister.
And he does the whole charm thing a lot better that Gordon Brown, who I have also met and interviewed. He seemed VERY ill at ease, with small talk, with interiews, with it all - hell, even with smiling.
But Cameron doesn't seem to have the same effortless ease that Tony Blair did. Again, I have met and interviewed the former Prime Minister.
I will not use the word "charisma" here, obviously.
Still, watching all three of them up close is a fascinating affair - especially how they act in the off beat moments. When they think no-one is watching, or they are talking to close advisors. When their public smiles and facade slip ever so slightly.
Cameron's hidden body language always seems to say to me, "Did they like me? Did I do that OK? Did I get all the questions right and am I top of the class? Am I the most popular?"
And I always find it hard to really like someone, who makes it so clear that they really want to be liked.
1 -The Headlines
In six months I will have no job.
Even though I haven't been fired, and I'm not willingly resigning. My company is "downsizing," and I will likely be one of many who are squeezed out.
And I don't hate my job. In fact most days I love it.
I'm not burnt out. (And before you lot at the back ask - no I am not old enough to be....)
In fact, I have wanted this career in television and news since I was a child. 12 to be exact. Before that I wanted to be an actress, but the level of loveydome and competitiveness was too much to take, even then.
Ironic, considering the industry I ended up in, dahling.
But I have known that unemployment has been pending for more than a year now.
This Blog is something I have decided to start, so that I can get things off my chest.
Because there are many days when it's hard not to be bitter. Or sad, or hopeful, philosophical or even excited. About changes being enforced on my life.
I plan to chart the final six months of my stable, well paid, enjoyable career into what happens beyond.
(Gosh I *shudder* just writing it. Really must work on that.)
There will be the odd industry story and gossip thrown in for good measure. That's what you all really want anyway.
But I also want to chronicle what happens when I leave the job that I have put my life into, and that I have adored for so long. And when lots of people around me are going through the same sad process.
This is the job that defines me - and not just at dinner parties ("Oh, I'm in television "meedyah" don't you know, yes it is very exciting. You want to know who I have met that is famous? And do I get nervous going live?" etc etc).
The job that cuts to the quick of who I am; gregarious, engaged, interested in people and the world around me, informed and opinionated.
Or rather, a nosey parker with a bloody big gob!
Then, there will be the "what happens beyond" part, which will likely entail a scary leap into the world of freelance journalism, of random shifts with strange hours and cold calls to "sell myself" to strangers.
Or if I am rubbish at that, lets call a spade a spade - full time unemployment.
Leaving this job could be the best, or the worst thing that has ever happened to me.
And I have no idea which.
Even though I haven't been fired, and I'm not willingly resigning. My company is "downsizing," and I will likely be one of many who are squeezed out.
And I don't hate my job. In fact most days I love it.
I'm not burnt out. (And before you lot at the back ask - no I am not old enough to be....)
In fact, I have wanted this career in television and news since I was a child. 12 to be exact. Before that I wanted to be an actress, but the level of loveydome and competitiveness was too much to take, even then.
Ironic, considering the industry I ended up in, dahling.
But I have known that unemployment has been pending for more than a year now.
This Blog is something I have decided to start, so that I can get things off my chest.
Because there are many days when it's hard not to be bitter. Or sad, or hopeful, philosophical or even excited. About changes being enforced on my life.
I plan to chart the final six months of my stable, well paid, enjoyable career into what happens beyond.
(Gosh I *shudder* just writing it. Really must work on that.)
There will be the odd industry story and gossip thrown in for good measure. That's what you all really want anyway.
But I also want to chronicle what happens when I leave the job that I have put my life into, and that I have adored for so long. And when lots of people around me are going through the same sad process.
This is the job that defines me - and not just at dinner parties ("Oh, I'm in television "meedyah" don't you know, yes it is very exciting. You want to know who I have met that is famous? And do I get nervous going live?" etc etc).
The job that cuts to the quick of who I am; gregarious, engaged, interested in people and the world around me, informed and opinionated.
Or rather, a nosey parker with a bloody big gob!
Then, there will be the "what happens beyond" part, which will likely entail a scary leap into the world of freelance journalism, of random shifts with strange hours and cold calls to "sell myself" to strangers.
Or if I am rubbish at that, lets call a spade a spade - full time unemployment.
Leaving this job could be the best, or the worst thing that has ever happened to me.
And I have no idea which.
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